HOCUS POCUS

I break my promise again to post at least once a month… :s

But anyway, I am not really sure about September, but the good news is, my abstract is accepted for EPTC conference!!! yey… :)

The deadline for final manuscript is on 1st October… well, I think am no longer unsure about September

Find it in a piece of paper hanging in my office cubicle…

 

DONT QUIT…

When things go wrong, as they sometimes will,

When the road you are trudging, seems all uphill

When the funds are low and debts are high

And when you want to smile but you have to sigh

When care is pressing you down a bit

Rest you must, but don’t you quit

Life is queer with its twists and turns

As every one of us sometimes learns

And many a failure turns about

When he might have won when he stuck it out

 

Don’t give up though the pace seems low

You may have succeed with another blow

 

Success is failure turned inside out

The silver tint of clouds of doubt

And you never can tell how close you are

It may be near when it seems so far

So stick to the fight when you are hardest hit

It is when things seem worse that you must not quit

More than a year after my last post… well, I will not try give any excuses for my laziness…

So what are the changes for the last 1 year then? Well, not much changes, but indeed, there are some changes… I was changing my job, that was the most obvious change. It has already almost 3 month since I started working in the new job.

I am doing research job right now, kind of job that I wanted to do. On top of that, the project that I am joining is biomedical devices related project which also the field that I wanted to do. So more or less, I should be happy with my current job, shouldnt I? Well, yes, I am kind of happy with my current job. But then again nothing is perfect, or it is just the human nature that never feel enough.

Another good news is that I got my final exam result last week, and I made it… yayyyy… I have finished my master degree. But the funny thing is, now I am confused what should I do next. End of one thing always means a beginning of another thing. But I dont want to begin another formal study, not for the next two or three years.

Well, thats all, nothing much nor important. But thinking of nothing important to write was so far the reason why I did not update my blog for more than a year. Now, I promise myslef to write at least once a month, even when it will be only one most unimportant sentence.

Just want to add a quote that I really like for Coelho book "The Zahir" : My day was good, let night fall….

And yeah, it is about my job…

Kinda feel that my current jobload is more than I can handle, more than I suppose to get in my current job level, and for sure more than what I am getting paid for… But maybe it is just my feeling coz everyone feel the same..

Quite an extreme feeling I experienced yesterday, because of a good year end review from my next level boss, but just few moments after that he scolded me for a very insignificant stuff (in my opinion) and I have a very good reason not to do that stuff…

Anyway, in that kind of situation, I am not kind of people that can keep quite and accept whatever my boss said. I think it is necessary to react appropriately to explain the situation and follow up with some action to clear the air. I did say “no” to my boss, and till now I am still wondering if I am doing the right thing, but I hope the action that I did right after that can really make him understand… finger crossed…

Anyway to boost my self confidence and self worthiness (and not to mention for celebrating narcissism ;P), I would like to share my bosses comment in my year end review…

Direct Boss comment :
Hamid has performed positively to all the challeges presented to him. Being in the job for 1 year, he has showed great initiative and autonomy.He still needs developement in organization awareness and integration to work more cohesively with process and production.

Next level Boss comment :
Hamid demonstrated his good capability with positive attitude even though he is one year experienced engineer.In 2009, big contribution is expected to make breakthrough in ViPower technology and to develop himself technically for personal point of view.

Pretty good huh? for sure there is always room for improvement… and the “breakthrough” expectation is a huge challenge… I hope that I can survive this year… another finger crossed…

Lots of random thoughts are now passing thru my head, and I don’t know why, I kinda feel tired lately. Well, I am maybe not really fit due to usual March-April syndrome of rainy to hot season transition, where we can experience two seasons in a day… My body just can’t stand it…  I used to have asthma when I was a kid and this period was the time when I would get my asthma attack. It was somehow cured as I’m growing up, but still I got sick during this time…

There was a reshuffle in my office, where I am ended up in new department and a new boss. On top of that, my job loads are also doubled now. I know that I should have taken it positively, because it means that they believe that I can handle new and bigger responsibilities. However, it is always easier said than done. Maybe, I just need sometimes to adapt… hopefully…

I’ll be back for holiday since next Thursday until early April. My office needs to be closed for 2 weeks with no production. It is not a good news, but in contrary, for me it is a much needed holiday. It is also mean that I will have no more annual leave for this year and have to take unpaid leave if necessary. But I just don’t care, I like holiday, who doesn’t?

So now, I am counting every second until next Thursday to go back home. There will be so much pressure to finish all my jobs before the holiday. But it will be okay, as I have seen the light in the end of the tunnel. Till then, I am just trying to stay alive….

by Robert Frost

Two roads diverged in a yellow wood,
And sorry I could not travel both
And be one traveler, long I stood
And looked down one as far as I could
To where it bent in the undergrowth;

Then took the other, as just as fair,
And having perhaps the better claim,
Because it was grassy and wanted wear;
Though as for that the passing there
Had worn them really about the same,

And both that morning equally lay
In leaves no step had trodden black.
Oh, I kept the first for another day!
Yet knowing how way leads on to way,
I doubted if I should ever come back.

I shall be telling this with a sigh
Somewhere ages and ages hence:
Two roads diverged in a wood, and I—
I took the one less traveled by,
And that has made all the difference.

Note :
I’ve just realised that the education system that I have been through for about 18 years not putting so much emphasis on language and literature… poor thing that I am actually quite interested in poem and such stuff… I mean in reading and analysing it, not in writing it…

Anyway, I found a very interesting poem with a very tricky hidden meaning ( I did googling to find the "true" meaning, but the deeper I dig, more confused I become), and it also lead me to the fact that this poem is a 4th grade assignment in some countries… yes, 4th grade, when I was still watching "ksatria baja hitam"… oh well…

I know its kinda sad to glorify the past…

But hell yeah… I was great…

It has been 1 year and 1 month since I have been working in my current company, and till now, I am still like my job (or may be even love it, am I?) There are so many reasons why I like my job, but doesnt matter how many reasons I have, I myself need a proof. I believe that when we like what we are doing we will eventually get reward that we can be proud of. This is because even when you are an extreme slacker (like myself?) but if you like what you are doing, you will do and try to make the best of it.

As a second chapter of my previous post. Here I got another one to celebrate :

Well, it is just a simple recognition, not like an employee of the quarter or the year. But it makes myself believe that I like my job. There is another certificate that I got thou :

This one is a certificate for a team project. Well actually I am still not getting what I want to get, a promotion… hahaha… may be I must wait "long-long" before it come…

There is something wrong in my blood

and its getting me bored

but they said only boring people get bored

 

There is something wrong in my gene

and it makes me think

thats why I commit so many sins